Comments on: Queen of Contrary http://www.tinytyrant.org/2008/12/queen-of-contrary Mon, 14 Jun 2010 21:55:41 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 By: Ellen http://www.tinytyrant.org/2008/12/queen-of-contrary/comment-page-1#comment-305 Ellen Thu, 11 Dec 2008 17:42:38 +0000 http://www.tinytyrant.org/?p=1086#comment-305 Offer options so she thinks she is making the choice. "Would you like grill cheese or nuggets?". "Which pair of pajamas do you want to wear?" etc. Also, I agree with Catherine, if it isn't a big deal let them go out in their pj's. We have days where Seth wears his shoes over his pj's. Have you noticed my son still wears his Halloween costume? Yeah, because I don't want to fight about it. Options are the best bet in my book. Toddlers are naturally defiant though aren't they. Offer options so she thinks she is making the choice. “Would you like grill cheese or nuggets?”. “Which pair of pajamas do you want to wear?” etc. Also, I agree with Catherine, if it isn’t a big deal let them go out in their pj’s. We have days where Seth wears his shoes over his pj’s. Have you noticed my son still wears his Halloween costume? Yeah, because I don’t want to fight about it. Options are the best bet in my book.

Toddlers are naturally defiant though aren’t they.

]]> By: Mountain Lover http://www.tinytyrant.org/2008/12/queen-of-contrary/comment-page-1#comment-304 Mountain Lover Thu, 11 Dec 2008 02:55:08 +0000 http://www.tinytyrant.org/?p=1086#comment-304 Xanax and vodka? Best suggestion I got. :) (For you, of course, not the kid) Maybe she's picking up on the stress and the seriousness of the situation too. Xanax and vodka? Best suggestion I got. :) (For you, of course, not the kid)

Maybe she’s picking up on the stress and the seriousness of the situation too.

]]> By: Catherine http://www.tinytyrant.org/2008/12/queen-of-contrary/comment-page-1#comment-303 Catherine Wed, 10 Dec 2008 23:17:53 +0000 http://www.tinytyrant.org/?p=1086#comment-303 My .02 ... she's testing you to see what she can get away with. Yes, her life was interrupted but they're flexible. Pick your battles. With the PJs, she can choose on mostly put them on herself. What does it matter as long as they're season appropriate? Going out in PJs, again doesn't really matter. It took me a long time to get here, but those battles just aren't worth it. Recently Audrey screamed about putting shoes on when we had to leave for the store. So I picked her up, put her in the car and we went. She had to ride in the cart since she didn't have shoes. She hates riding in the cart. We haven't had the shoe problem since. Also, she cries and cries for me to help her at bedtime. If she asks politely she gets all the help she wants but if she yells at me or Peter about wanting me, she doesn't get my help. It's a natural consequence, ask nicely you get what you want. Walking out was good. We have a new rule for both kids: no one wants to hear you scream so take it to your room. No arguing, not battling. It's so easy to engage in a power struggle with a toddler. They lure you in. My .02 … she’s testing you to see what she can get away with. Yes, her life was interrupted but they’re flexible. Pick your battles. With the PJs, she can choose on mostly put them on herself. What does it matter as long as they’re season appropriate? Going out in PJs, again doesn’t really matter. It took me a long time to get here, but those battles just aren’t worth it.

Recently Audrey screamed about putting shoes on when we had to leave for the store. So I picked her up, put her in the car and we went. She had to ride in the cart since she didn’t have shoes. She hates riding in the cart. We haven’t had the shoe problem since.

Also, she cries and cries for me to help her at bedtime. If she asks politely she gets all the help she wants but if she yells at me or Peter about wanting me, she doesn’t get my help. It’s a natural consequence, ask nicely you get what you want.

Walking out was good. We have a new rule for both kids: no one wants to hear you scream so take it to your room. No arguing, not battling. It’s so easy to engage in a power struggle with a toddler. They lure you in.

]]>