How young is too young for minions?
Posted on July 15, 2008
Okay, first off let me tell you, I am realistic about my daughter’s charm. I totally understand that although John and I think she’s the funniest, smartest, most talented being to ever walk the earth, not everyone is going to feel that way. And yet, Chloe has this strange “pied-piper” effect on other children. I swear, when ever we go anywhere that a large group of children are playing, one or two of them attach themselves to her and follow her around. Now, she is two, and doesn’t really have the social skills yet to instigate these friendships, nor does she have the skills to maintain them. And, quite frankly, she doesn’t even seem to enjoy them. Most of the time she’ll laugh with the kid for a while, and then start getting this look on her face like, “Why are you following me?”
Sometimes, these kids will get physical with her. Most of the time, its just grabbing her hands. A couple of times a random, strange kid will start hugging her and trying to kiss her. Its usually around this time that I start to get uncomfortable with the situation. I don’t want to give Chloe any of my own “personal space” hang ups, but at the same time, I think there should be boundaries. I would be absolutely miserable if some random person came over to me, started grabbing me, hugging me and kissing me. I am pretty sure physical violence would ensue (I do carry a book in my purse which makes it pretty heavy, I could inflict some serious damage.) And I am pretty sure that a lawsuit would follow; either by me or against me, depending on my aim.
Chloe will begin by gently pushing the child away, and then tries to avoid further contact. But, again I must reiterate that she’s two. So, avoiding further contact sometimes means not so gentle pushing and outright hitting (maybe she’s like me after all?) I do the appropriate verbal reprimands, “No pushing/hitting Chloe, use your words, tell them you don’t like that and to please stop.” What I really want to do is show her exactly where to kick to do the most damage. How do you punish a kid for defending her personal space?
And what’s with all these grabby children? I haven’t spent a whole lot of time with younger children, is this common? And if so, are there any suggestions on how I can better handle these situations, or even better, equip Chloe with the skills she needs to handle these situations? We were at the swimming pool the other day, and a little girl literally pulled Chloe under water, and this was after I asked her to stop grabbing at Chloe. (And don’t even get me started on where her parents were.) Obviously, in that situation I removed Chloe until the little girl started targeting some other poor kid. I certainly don’t want Chloe to get violent with another child, but I also can’t blame her if these kids just won’t leave her alone!
Just as an aside, after rereading this post I realized that I didn’t add that Chloe also does a fair amount of grabbing herself. But, usually it’s with kids she knows, like Seth or Sabrina, and I really try to tell her not to grab because they don’t like it.